Early morning smile.

Today I saw a spark in you,
In that early morning smile,
A spark it dawned I haven't seen,
In quite a little while.
The guilt for not knowing,
That it could have, should have, been.

Guilt

I woke,
From a dream,
Where I was happy,
And loved.

I woke,
From the dream,
And felt guilt.

I am awake,
At least.
At last.

The glow.

From the glow in your eyes,
I know my response.
Against my better judgement,
I will say yes.

I will say yes,
Because it brings you joy.
I can not take for granted,
Nor waste, such light.

At all.

He played the switch again today.
How expertly he twists it.
I saw it clear. Is that progress?
So many years, I missed it.
The look of hurt, of wounded soul.
As if it was not what he meant at all.

It comes without apology.
It comes just to set his burden free.
It comes to wrack your heart with guilt.
Mine already clogged with his emotional silt.

He played the switch again today.
How expertly he twists it.
I saw it clear, but still felt guilt.
The untainted heart, I miss it.
The gift of guilt, of damaged soul.
As if it was not what he meant at all.

So are you

I want to reach out and hold your hand.
I can't, but want you to understand.
Though there is distance between us.
And circumstance prevents travel,
I will be me, and write,
Let out thoughts unravel.

I'll say some right things, hopefully
And some wrong things, suredly,
But I am here,
You're not alone.
I'm the glowing light,
On your mobile phone.

You have this, I know it.
No fairy tale is all good.
No journey is all easy,
But on solid ground you're stood.

It's tough, but hold on,
Its just a tough time.
You're tough, you're strong,
You'll craft your lifetime.

One step, next step, with tears or none,
One day soon, this challenge will be gone.

You will breathe deep,
And really smile,
You will look back,
At this long hard mile,
And know it was worth it.
Trite but true.
The time will be worth it,
And so are you.

Great love

I expected a great love...
The words were not mine,
But left a scratch on my heart
That won't leave me with time.

Expected a great love?
I don't believe I ever had,
So for a moment, I paused,
And embraced the sad.

My life is of moments,
No grand fairy story,
No happily ever afters,
No basking in glory.

Yet, though 'true love'
Does not ring true.
It does not mean,
That I don't love you

Hope and fear

I am the strangest mix of hope and fear.
I am new to the place we stand right here.
I expected a reaction I knew, and didn't get.
So I fear it worse and just not yet.
If it doesn't come, what does that mean?
It is that this encourages hope in dream.