Stomach curls.

A little positive human interaction,
Was all it took to switch up the mood.
A little care from others,
And not allowed to sit and brood.
Then I find I let you down,
And my stomach curls in fear.
You are everything to me.
You are almost all that I hold dear.
My former mood returns.
I want to push thoughts from my mind.
In trying to take care of you,
I end up being unkind.
These lessons I must keep learning,
Always at expense.
What can I do to fix this?
What counts as recompense?